This morning I read a post by one of my favorite mommy bloggers, OHMommy. If you aren't following her, you should...her blog is ClassyChaos. In her post she recounted how her daughter revealed that her birthday wish was for her momma not to scream anymore. My heart sunk with hers, knowing that I too have experienced the same pain when my own children have shared the same sentiment about me.
Much like OHMommy, I strive to be a strong, calm momma. However, I have strong willed, emotional/passionate children and that doesn't always bring out the best in me. Tonight was a perfect case in point. From the moment I picked up Mr. B after work, he was grumbling. He had too much homework. His life is boring. He doesn't have a new drumset that he can play in the school's upcoming talent show. The list went on. And on.
Now, I know that most kids need time to decompress after a day at school and Mr. B is definitely one of them. I knew he was venting, and I tried to keep things light, and upbeat. But for every positive thing I said, he had a negative comeback. By the time I got home, he was being disrespectful and I'd had enough. That's when my voice began to raise (OK, I was yelling). We heatedly "debated" for several more minutes until I realized there was no reasoning with him until he calmed down. A timeout ensued and so did my guilt. I know I should have remained calm...I am the adult after all.
I'm always trying to teach Mr. B and Miss Monkey that I discipline them because I love them and want to help them become strong, independent adults with good character. Sometimes they understand. More often they tell me they wish I didn't have to yell or "be mean" (their interpretation of punishment.)
Life lessons are hard (especially for mommas), but no one ever said parenting was an easy job. So true. But being a momma is one job that I wouldn't trade for the world.